Oh No

Christmas Eve. The Ex, Dick, came over. He did. I let him.

He has been dropping all out hints since I have been speaking to him again. He is blunt. Raw and blunt about me. I have been ignoring him for weeks.

He blurts out what he wants to do to me, what I do for him by just existing, or just the sound of my voice on the phone while I am trying to speak to him.

The mistake was my desire to try a new cocktail, Cointeaupolitan. It was pink, my favorite color. It was delicious and I am not one for sweet drinks, but the lemon juice cut the sweet just right.

It was a cold, cold drink, having left it sit on ice before pouring.

After about four to five of these, I was a little loose. Dick was practically pornographic all night, trying to get me interested.

The drinks let my guard down. Dick is extremely handsome, tall, dark hair and blue eyes, and strong. He is very controlling though as if he owned me.

He is also the only man who I have met who is inexhaustable sexually. The man is a powehouse. Girls I am talking HOURS. I used to fall out from sheer exhuastion. He is also very considerate. If it was to be all about me, then so be it. He would not feel slighted at all, which was good because sometimes a girl just does not want to, you know what I mean? In otherwords, as macho as he is, he never had any problem putting my needs or desires first and never getting to his at all.

But that was unable to keep me, and he is trying to keep me again. I am not a kept woman.

"Muse, you look beautiful tonight," he would say.

"Listen Dick, do you think you can remember how to mix the damned drink or do I have to bring the damned computer to read off how much of what we need to mix?" I would say to ignore him.

"Muse, you look very sexy in that shirt you are wearing," he would observe.

I had on a long sleeved crew neck that was loose. It was battleship gray. It was not sexy at all.

I cannot repeat what else he said because it was very graphic. He speaks his mind sexually. He finds it a normal part of life. I find it annoying since I was not interested since we were no longer going out.

I just want him as a friend.

But the Cointreau wanted a lover. Damned orange peels!

Now, we did not have sex, because he was on his way to midnight mass that was changed to 10 pm, but he did take a bit of the edge off of me tonight. I was on my tip toes hanging on to him and he had his hand on the small of my back supporting me. The man is strong, girls. I was able to propel backwards while he held me at my waist, almost suspended above the floor.

He wanted to come back after mass, but I shooed him out. I told him I was tired and was going to retire.

At 12:05 Christmas Day, or tonight as I see it, he rang to tell me what he was going to be thinking about in his sleep, what he thought about while singing carols during the service because of my lingering scent on his hands.

And he has no idea that I supposed to be meeting Quiet Man for coffee later on this Christmas day.